Study finds poor people are the wealthiest

The Institute of Aristocratic Moral Satisfaction (IAMS) conducted a groundbreaking study which reveals that, contrary to popular belief, poor people are the wealthiest. “We know it’s hard to digest such a discovery but as Einstein once said, ‘facts don’t care about your feelings,’” a spokesperson said.

“You don’t have to be a scientist to know this. All it takes is a little bit of common sense,” he continued, “what are the most valuable things in the world? Is it gold? No. Is it diamond? No. Is it a Bugatti? Again, no. You see, all of these things come with a price tag. So what is it that does not have a monetary value? It’s thinking, waiting and fasting.”

“We assembled the ‘wealthiest’ people from around the world and made them read Siddhartha, a novel on spiritual awakening by Herman Hesse. After all of them were done reading the book, we asked them the same question: what is the most priceless thing in the world? Their answer was identical; it’s thinking, waiting and fasting, and they all agreed that poor people can do it better. Hence, poor people are the wealthiest because their wealth is so immense, it cannot be quantified.”

“Some people say that the richest 1 percent owns more than half of the cumulative wealth in the world. But is that really true? The reality is that their wealth is so little it can easily be summed up in a few digits,” the spokesperson continued, “a few pieces a paper is not a reliable standard to quantify wealth. If you want to flourish in this capitalistic society, stop thinking like a capitalist about the capitalists.”

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