Chief Selector and Head Coach Misbah-ul-Haq decides to select his clones as the playing 11 against Australia

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Pakistan recently suffered a whitewash against a young Sri Lankan team in a T20I series at home, and the embarrassing defeat put everything in perspective for Misbah-ul-Haq, the Chief Selector-cum-Head Coach of the national team. Sources tell us that Misbah had been extremely disappointed with the attitude of players who lack discipline and do not adhere to professional standards until he realized he does not need any of those players. In fact, he does not need anyone at all.

Misbah-ul-Haq has been one of the most prolific Pakistani batsmen during the late 2000s and the first half of 2010s, and that too when the Pakistani batting woes reached a crescendo. It makes sense that in the time of crisis, when the team is struggling to regain momentum, he should hold the two top posts in the national side. As the chief selector and head coach, it only fits that he should give himself the chance to lead not only off-field but also on-field.

What do you do with an insubordinate team of players who lack discipline and skills to compete in the international platform? You put them all on the bench. Through the modern cloning technique, Misbah-ul-Haq is in the process of making an all-new playing 11 comprising of only his clones. This is the first step in Misbah’s “global expansion” program.

“Some people say that the new team is too overpowered,” Misbah said in a press briefing, “that 11 Misbah-ul-Haqs will give Pakistan an unfair advantage. To them, I say, be patient. One day, the whole ICC will be Misbah-ul-Haq, and so will every other team. Then it will be a level playing field with an equal chance for everyone to succeed.”

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